I still don't understand. But my mind keeps acting like that isn't important.
HOW IS THAT NOT IMPORTANT?
nothing around me is real.
It's like a UPS truck exploding in a bag of green beans while 5 million wreckless musicians collapse fingers into the screaming death of why can't you see the cup of posters ahead of your jelly?
Reading that sentence is what my life feels like when I look at it.
but then I go and do basic tasks, and do them well, when I have no grasp of my bearings: the premises of my existence, yet I go on existing! Unaware of my lack of explanation and UNDERSTANDING!